Posted by: jen | April 1, 2009

Why God Made Moms

This was sent my way today and it made me smile.  Enjoy…

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?

  • She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
  • Mostly to clean the house.
  • To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

  • He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
  • Magic plus super powers adn a lot of stirring.
  • God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mother’s made of?

  • God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
  • They had to get their start from men’s bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?

  • We’re related.
  • God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s mom like me.

What kid of a little girl was your mom?

  • My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
  • I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
  • They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?

  • His last name.
  • She had to know his background.  Like is he a crook?  Does he get drunk on beer?
  • Does he make at least $800 a year?  Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?

  • My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world.  And my mom eats a lot.
  • She got too old to do anything else with him.
  • My grandma says that  mom didn’t have her thinking cap on.

Who’s the boss at your house?

  • Mom doesn’t want to be the boss, but she has to because dad’s such a goof ball.
  • Mom.  You can tell by room inspection.  She sees the stuff under the bed.
  • I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do that dad.

What’s the difference between moms and dads?

  • Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
  • Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
  • Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power ’cause that’s who you got to ask i f you want to sleep over at your friends.
  • Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?

  • Mothers don’t do spare time.
  • To hear her tell it, she pays the bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

  • On the inside she’s already perfect.  Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
  • Diet. You know, her hair.  I’d diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

  • She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean.  I’d get rid of that.
  • I’d  make my mom smarter.  Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.
  • I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

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